Thanksgiving cook confronts sister-in-law who claims to be "allergic" to mushrooms, despite using them in her stuffing every Thanksgiving, SIL leaves TG weekend early after being accused of faking her allergy: 'You weren't allergic last year'

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  • Two woman in tense conversation while cutting mushrooms
  • AITA For Laughing About a Pretend Allergy?

    Parents gave up wanting responsibilities for Thanksgiving meal about five years ago. My house is big enough to host and I enjoy cooking so for the past three years the duties have fallen to me.
  • I make the turkey, the stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy and rolls. Others bring sides and things like chips and drinks.
  • This year, my brother and his wife came into town early and stayed over. Thanksgiving, mid- morning my sister-in- law wanders into the kitchen while I'm making stuffing.
  • She sees my pile of bread crumbs/celery/onion/sausage in a bowl and me sautéing mushrooms. She says, "What are THOSE for?" I told her they were for the stuffing.
  • She put her hands on her hips and said, freaking out, "You can't put mushrooms in the stuffing.
  • I'm allergic!" I was stupefied. I said, "When did this happen?" And she just looked at me like I was an idiot so I said, "When did you discover you're allergic to mushrooms?" She scoffed and said, "I've always been allergic." Now the thing is, when I make my stuffing I like things to be well incorporated, and I always chop the mushrooms small after I sauté them.
  • Cutting Thanksgiving turkey
  • So they're not actually apparent in the mix as mushrooms among the other ingredients. I burst out in a laugh and said, "Well, that's interesting, because you weren't allergic last year.
  • And you weren't allergic the year before." She asked me what I meant, and I told her I'd been making stuffing like this every year she's eaten it, and furthermore she's raved over it, and had zero allergic reaction.
  • So maybe she's not allergic. Maybe she just thinks she doesn't like mushrooms. She got pissed and went to my brother to tell him, and she told him she wanted to leave, but he wanted to stay.
  • So she spent the entire rest of the day shooting daggers at me with her eyes.
  • They were supposed to stay through the weekend but they left Thanksgiving night. I confided in my mom and my sister yesterday and they kind of chuckled and said it's not my fault, but my brother texted me this morning that I could have just not used the mushrooms, and that I made his wife feel stupid for no reason.
  • I maintain I didn't make her feel anything. AITAH?
  • NTA. SummitJunkie7 She could just not eat the stuffing. And if she really believes she has an allergy "you ate this last year and the year before, did you have an adverse reaction?" is important medical information, so you were right to tell her. If what she does with that information is feel stupid and throw fits, that's on her.
  • OP recalcitrant_scribe She doesn't just eat the stuffing, traditionally, she goes in for seconds, and then for a midnight snack covered with gravy.
  • Women arguing on the couch in front of man
  • EntertheOcean I also developed allergies in my 20s that I did not have previously. The struggle of trying to get people to believe me was insane. However, NTA as OP didn't know and has been making the same recipe for years without comment
  • OP recalcitrant_scribe Yeah. It's why I asked her about when it happened. I have a friend who is allergic to shellfish. Went from being able to eat shrimp to full blown throat closing symptoms within about 6 months.
  • Ok-Comedian-9377 My husband is "allergic" to mushrooms. Turns out... he is "intolerant" of mushrooms. Meaning it gives him the shits. But not right after, like later. And it's from the chitin in the mushroom. Food allergies to mushrooms is EXTREMELY uncommon. Intolerance is a relatively common occurrence. Anyway, I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt that she is intolerant and not allergic and maybe does want to try and avoid shrooms. She should have laughed to and just been like well can we n
  • OP recalcitrant_scribe If she hadn't thrown a fit, or if I'd known, and hadn't used all the breadcrumbs I could have made her a separate pan. But the thing is, she hasn't just eaten stuffing as a dab on her plate. She's eaten it like other people eat dessert. It's one of her favorite leftovers and as far as I know, no issues.
  • darkhuntresssyn45 NTA. My mom had a similar issue with my aunt one year. It wasn't an allergy it was that my aunt doesn't like the idea of giblets in food, which a lot of people don't and that's ok, but my mom has ALWAYS puts giblets in the stuffing and gravy and my aunt ate it every year and RAVED about it. Well, one year her and my uncle showed up early and my aunt saw my mom boiling the giblets in chicken broth and when she asked about it my mom told her what they were for. My aunt lost her s
  • OP recalcitrant_scribe Her loss.
  • Witty-Stock-4913 NTA. You pointed out you've used the same recipe. If she felt stupid, that was entirely herself making her feel stupid. You said nothing whatsoever to make her feel that way.
  • Fancy-Still-4297 NTA because no one with a food allergy should eat at someone else's house without disclosing that allergy. I have several food allergies but only a couple cause anaphylactic reactions. I carry EpiPens and always disclose my allergies when accepting an invitation, basically saying I don't want to be a pain but I can't eat these 5 items so if thats a problem let me know.

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